Revealing Truth…more of a personal post

While at work today, I had the opportunity to share adoption truth with a male adoptee. During our numerous discussions, the fact that he was an adoptee had come up. Our conversation continued and I learned that he had not searched for his natural family but had thought about it many times. He stopped in again this evening for the last time regarding my business and I reminded him that if he chose to search that I would help and gave him my adoption support email.
I then shared with him the truth about adoption from a mothers perspective and shared some un-named stories of how mothers lost their child to adoption. I relayed stories of drugging, withholding support (financial and emotional by family members and social programs), the physical restraint, threats and abduction. The truth is horrifying. I could see it on his face. I live it so I relay these instances as fact, he had to digest it.
Just as an adoptee has no clue of his mothers pain and trauma in losing him, most mothers have no clue as to the trauma that her lost child has endured. Those of us who are out of the fog need to make it our mission to educate each other. An adoptee has every right to be angry, but rarely at his mother. Instead he needs to be angry at the adoption machine who tore him from his mother for profit which left both of them with lifelong scars which will never heal.

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7 thoughts on “Revealing Truth…more of a personal post

  1. Kudos – most adoptees don’t get it – they feel like they were a commodity. We are viewed as being coldhearted, after all we walked away without a thought nor a care about the child we bore. Most do not realize how desperately we searched for help, how every door we tried was slammed in our face, and the way we were told “if you love this child you would do what is best for him/her, which is go away and leave them with worthier people”; unfortunately, the way this game is rigged, we were bound to fail. So sad.

  2. “Those of us who are out of the fog need to make it our mission to educate each other. An adoptee has every right to be angry, but rarely at his mother. Instead he needs to be angry at the adoption machine who tore him from his mother for profit which left both of them with lifelong scars which will never heal.”

    AMEN!!!

  3. I didn’t realize what I had done was so wrong until she found me. That’s when took the blinders off. Now I know and now I tell…everyone that will listen. I tell them why separating mother and child is wrong. Even if a child is truly orphaned, they need to know of their family.

  4. I am an adoptee and I have spoken to my birth mother and have met my father’s family, but never him. He passed away from cancer before knowing he had a daughter.
    Can you tell me about the “adoption machine” that you speak about? I don’t understand what you mean by that..

    • Hi Elizabeth, I am sorry for your loss of your natural father. I am happy to hear you have connected to his family.

      You were wondering what the adoption machine is, I will do my best to explain it as it is much more than what I will describe. The adoption machine I refer to is the industry or business of selling womb-fresh infants to infertile couples with the promise of this child being the same as thier own, which is untrue. It is comprised of the persistant hunting and tearing down of a mother in crisis pregnancy in order to obtain her child for resale. They will tell you it is for the “best interest” of the child when in fact it has nothing to do with the child and everything to do with making money. Most of these mothers had never abused a child nor drugs, they were stripped of thier child strictly for the crime of being young and unwed, then tossed back into society traumatized, bleeding from birth and told never to speak of “it” again. This industry will tell a woman to prove her love she must give her child away and then berate her later for doing the exact same thing. This industry seperates mother and child for no other reason than to take from the “undeserving” unwed and to give to the “deserving” wed. It takes away the heritage of a child and hides his/her true identities and then claims to have done so to protect the shame of the mother who born him/her. These crimes are not only committed against the mothers but in reality against the child who was adopted, sealing thier own information away from them even as adults. This is what I call the adoption machine.

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